These Moments

December 12, 2008
Eight days old

This morning, I brought Lane downstairs to hold him close and nurse him for the morning. As the sun started to shine for the day, Lane lie his head in my arm and fell back asleep. With a cool chill still in the air from the night before, I gathered a blanket around my son and pulled him in closer to rest on my chest.

Together, we went upstairs to cuddle in our warm bed. The moment reminded me of those not so long ago when Lane was still a newborn. The chilly air and fluffy covers sent me back to a time when Lane would spend his days asleep in my arms. For hours, I would hold him close and snuggle his little body against mine.

I knew those moments would not last forever.


More and more lately, Lane squiggles out of my arms quickly. There are blocks to hide under the couch, food to munch, places to crawl, music to dance to and toys to play with. He still spends time with his mama each day. He will crawl in to my arms when he is tired, when he is hungry, when he has one of his many bumps and falls each day or when he just needs a few moments of love. However, our days of snuggling each other for hours are gone.

This morning, I took advantage of his desire to cuddle and sleep in my arms. I admired every feature of his face: his chubby cheeks, button nose and long eyelashes. I basked in his perfection.

I made a wish for my son. I wished that he will always know how much I love him. I know these moments will soon fade. A time will come when he will no longer look to my arms for comfort. And after that, there will be friends, and sports to play, and girls to date. His mama will be the last thing on his mind.

However, my one wish for my son is for him to always know how much I love him. For him to feel that love years from now just as strongly as he felt it today.

And for him to have the confidence and pride to love himself just as much.

September 30, 2009